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Motherhood

I Don’t Like Being a Stay at Home Mom

written by an Anonymous Mom

I am a mother to a soon to be 4 year old daughter and a 2 year old son. I have been a stay at home mom for a year now and hate it.

I love my kids but sometimes I wonder if this is what I really wanted.

When I got married my husband wanted kids and I told him that I wanted kids too but in the back of my mind I wasn’t sure. I feel so alone now.

I have absolutely no friends. I am not close with my husband’s family and I’m not close enough to mine that I want to talk about this with them and I am an only child.

My husband has never helped me with the kids. Only when I worked is when he had to take care of them. I have asked him why he doesn’t help and he said that it was my job. I told him that they are his kids too but he made up the excuse that he works too much.

He recently became self-employed.  He is now home more often and working from the house. I now feel like I have to take care of three children.

I will admit that our marriage isn’t the greatest and we have little sex… but mainly because I don’t want it. If I ask him to watch the kids while I run to the store he will make up an excuse why he can’t and often say I will get what you need while I’m out later.

I’ve even gotten up early in the morning before anyone else to go to the grocery store so he wouldn’t have to watch them. He knows that I’m tired of the kids and need to get away for a while but he doesn’t let it happen. If I want to go shopping for the day I have to take the kids to my parents.

We have no babysitters or friends that will watch our kids my parents will only watch them during the day. We have not gone out in 4 years to have our time together. My husband doesn’t like to take the kids anywhere because of the way they act in public. So we never go anywhere. But he thinks it’s okay to go play poker or shoot some pool at night when its bedtime for everyone else.

My kids are making me crazy. I get mad at them for no reason. I don’t want to play with them at times. I leave the TV on most the day so they will leave me alone.

I feel like I have no life.  I feel like my husband is holding me hostage so he doesn’t have to take care of the kids.

I’m so unhappy with my life right now. There are so many things I could go on about but I will leave it at that.

 

AMW Editor:  Please let a comment for this mom – it might just cheer her up or help her.

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Health

Do You Have Dense Breasts?

I’ve had a scare with my annual breast exam once.

There was a lump my doctor found in doing my breast exam one time.  She sent me for a breast ultrasound and a mammogram.  Luckily, it ended up being fatty tissue and nothing more serious.

But I wonder, if my doctor hadn’t sent me for testing and it turned out to be something, what would I have done?

My friend Dee Brun aka Cocktail Deeva recently went for a breast ultrasound at VIP Breast Imaging because she has dense breasts.  It’s only company in Canada that provides this service.

What I didn’t know is that mammography is not useful in finding breast tumors in dense breast tissue characteristic of women under 40 years!  This is important to know!  Women with dense breasts are 5-6 times more likely to develop breast cancer.

Having an ultrasound is a more secure way to determine if there is a tumour in your breasts as the ultrasound can see the difference between the dense tissue and the cancer. With a mammogram, the tumour can hide in the tissue and not be detected at an early age. As well, dense tissue and tumours both appear as white on a mammogram making it difficult to detect.

ABUS is specifically designed for breast ultrasound screening and diagnosis.  In one sweep of the machine, ABUS is able to take 600 images of the breast tissue and captures images approximately every two millimetres.  Unlike hand-held ultrasounds which can only capture specific areas of the breast, ABUS captures the entire breast in 3 dimensions, providing a much more detailed scan.

Dee had an Automated Breast Ultrasound – ABUS and allowed herself to be recorded in this video.

 

 

If your doctor doesn’t request an ultrasound or if you’re on a waiting list and you don’t want to wait, then this might be a good option for you.  For women with dense breasts, the ABUS is much more detailed than a regular hand-held ultrasound.

Having this service is outside the public health care system and costs $300. Many extended healthcare providers do cover diagnostic imaging services in their plans. The coverage may be a portion or total cost of your scan depending on your insurance policy. It is also tax deductible. There is also a program in place to help underprivileged women.

If you are concerned about your breast health and have family history of breast cancer, it may be a good idea to get an ABUS ultrasound done.

525 University Ave, Toronto

Phone: 647-350-2229

toronto@vipbreastimaging.com

http://www.vipbreastimaging.com/

They offered me a free ABUS ultrasound but I want to give it to one of my readers.  Enter for a chance to win a free ultrasound in Toronto:

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cforms contact form by delicious:days

 

 

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Health

My Health Reference: The Complete Canadian Health Information Site

When you need to find out information related to your health, where do you go?  Often when I’m searching on the internet, I seem to always end up on American sites.  But the information and statistics may not be relevant to me because I live in Canada.

Now, there is a website that offers Canadian health information.  is a complete health resource that includes Canadian resources, statistics, expert information and a directory.  The website is bilingual; all content is available in both English and French.

Created by Telus Health Solutions, MyHealthReference.com covers topics such as:

  • Family planning/health (contraception, physical fitness for families, prevention, programs for families and children/teen health/information)
  • Fitness (exercise and fitness tips for good health)
  • General wellness (foods that prevent cancer risk, diabetes, flu and cold, depression)
  • Government (legislation and health)
  • Travel (travel vaccines, information on visiting travel clinics, immunizations)
  • And much more!

my health reference, myhealthreference.com

The Health A to Z page covers every health topic from allergies to weight loss with fact sheets and articles on each topic.   Check Your Symptoms is a cool interactive diagram where you can find topics related to your symptoms.  I liked the interactive tool that helps you figure out what your health issue is based on the symptoms you input.

You can also do quizzes to check on a health concern, for example, answer questions to see if your child may have an ear infection, or if you’re suffering from post-partum depression.

The site also features some neat web applications and mobile apps where you can organize your health data.  The apps can help you monitor critical health information, complete health and wellness related activities, and to educate yourself about important health issues.

There is even a quit smoking app and other technology apps such as pedometers – pretty cool for those of you who are always on the go.  Another great resource is the TELUS personal health record, an online tool for managing your health information as well as the health data of your family.  It’s a fabulous feature to have on your phone when you’re running to doctor appointments.

If you want to stay on top of Canadian health news, the site features timely articles as well.  There is also a page of Expert Advice where three featured experts cover everything and anything around medicine, naturopathic, and nutrition.

also boasts a directory which can help you find support groups and services in specific areas within Canada.  You simply search for a support service or group in your area.

A pretty complete Canadian health website, wouldn’t you say?

My Health Reference is also running an amazing contest called Apple a Day contest where you can enter to win an Apple product a day!

Be sure to visit and like them on Facebook!

Remember, the website is a wealth of information but not a substitute for visiting your doctor. Please visit your doctor for proper diagnosis and treatment.

This post was proudly sponsored by Telus Health Solutions; the opinions herein are my own.

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Books & Music

Gotye Live in Concert: Amazing

Last week I won tickets to see Gotye, Up Close And Personal thanks to 102.1 The Edge.

It was at a secret location and the radio station was giving away tickets through their website and on air but where would the concert be?

It ended up being a very intimate live performance at the Sound Academy, maybe 200 people?

People were sitting in a lounge-like setting while my friend and amotherworld blogger Shannon Lintott and I were just two feet away from the stage.

102.1 The Edge recorded the live performance as Gotye played songs from his album “Making Mirrors”.

What an incredible private concert – the Australian singer sounded amazing live.  His voice – just as you hear him on the album.

Here are some photos of the evening and a video of his hit song, Somebody That I Used to Know.

Gotye16

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lifestyle

Valentine’s Day for Singles: 5 Ways to Enjoy It

by Mariana Morales

Valentine’s Day is great as a child – exchanging cards, getting candy and cupcakes, and lots of chocolate.

However, when you start growing up, it becomes something more. It becomes a day to celebrate the love for your significant other. When you’re single however, the day every year just brings some people down.

But don’t worry! Instead of feeling down and lonely, there are many things that can be done and things to remember to lift your spirits.
1. Your identity

Always remember that your relationship status does not define who you are. You don’t introduce yourself including the fact that you’re single, or even saying you’re taken. There is so much about yourself that you have to remember and that’s the reason you have family and friends who love you.

2. Commercial Holiday

One thing people have to realize is that Valentine’s Day is a commercial holiday. It’s those holidays that fill the stores with red and pink hearts, chocolates, cards, even lingerie but it’s all for money. If you’re in a relationship, everyday should be a day to express your love for each other, not only on Valentine’s Day.

3. Friends and Family

It’s best to find people who love you and get together with them. It doesn’t have to be on the day itself, but it’ll definitely keep you in a good mood. They’ll remind you why they care about you, and you’ll start remember why you’re such a great person. With your single friends, you could even do an anti-Valentine’s Day party for fun.

4. Go shopping!

For most of us ladies, when we’re feeling down, a great way to cheer up is to pamper ourselves. Go get your hair done, nails done, go shopping, or buy something for yourself that will just keep you going.

5. Stay Positive

It’s often hard to stay positive when all your friends have someone to spend Valentine’s Day with. But stay positive! If you’re really feeling down about being alone, think of positive ways to improve your chances of finding a relationship. Sometimes you’re not in the right place to be on the search for someone, but good things come to those who wait. Don’t look for him, let him come to you and while you wait, focus on yourself.

 

Mariana Morales is a full-time student at Conestoga College studying Print Journalism. She enjoys photography and is a volunteer at the Snap KW newspaper. What makes her different? She loves video games. In her spare time, she writes articles for a gaming website called Hooked Gamers. She hopes one day to work in the video game industry.  Follow her on Twitter.

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Entertainment

Grammys 2012: Recap, Adele and Foo Fighters

 

The 2012 Grammy Awards were definitely overshadowed by the passing of Whitney Houston.  But the show went on.

And it was an OK show.  Sorry to say music fans.  Maybe I was just a little sleepy and irritated but I found much of the show to be quite ‘meh’.

Maybe I’m just de-sensitized because I’ve seen one good performance after another that I need to really be wowed to care?

Like when the Foo Fighters came on stage and sang and played actual instruments in front of a huge crowd, rocking it out?  Not to say that dancing and lip-synching isn’t entertaining… but I love live bands – with a drummer, guitarist, bassist and lead singer, ya know?

Choreography is great but when it takes up 99% of a music awards show, I get a little stabby.

Is this what the majority of Canadians and Americans really listen to most of the time?  Mainstream pop music?

Meh.

The highlights were seeing some music legends like Stevie Wonder and The Beach Boys.  Paul McCartney sang a song so reminiscent of Barbara Streisand, I was just waiting for Babs to jump on stage and join him.

Jennifer Hudson paid tribute to Whitney Houston with a performance of “I Will Always Love You”.  A good effort considering the award show didn’t have time to put anything together for the late singer.

Rihana with her Tina Turner-esque hairdo and Katy Perry with a blue crimped bob… just a reminder of why I just can’t really be bothered to listen to pop music.

I used to like Coldplay a lot before they became so pop/ mainstream… and  maybe before he married Gwyneth.

Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters had a rockin’ performance and gave the best speech – “We made it in my garage with a tape machine.”  Real instruments and a real voice – no gimmicks, no crazy choreography – people want back to the basics.  Ironically, their speech was cut off – to the electronic music of LMFAO.

No wonder the super-talented Adele got a standing ovation and received six awards – her voice – that’s what really counts.

Watch Adele’s 2012 Grammy performance.

Watch Dave Grohl’s speech:

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Entertainment

Whitney Houston: How Did She Die?

After the shocking passing of Whitney Houston, the question everyone is asking is – how did Whitney Houston die?

The cause of death is still unknown but we should have answers soon.  TMZ reports that the autopsy has been completed but results would not be released.  Toxicology results will take four to six weeks.

Houston was found in the bathtub of her Beverly Hilton Hotel room on Saturday.  Many are speculating that the pop diva, 48, may have fallen asleep or lapsed into unconsciousness in the bathtub and drowned.   TMZ was told that Houston had been drinking the night before her death, and the alcohol combined with Xanax could have sedated her.

Police said that there were no obvious signs of criminal intent at the scene of her death. Her body was discovered by a member of her entourage.

Houston’s teenage daughter, Bobbi Kristina, was taken to hospital Sunday due to reaction of losing her mother.  Bobby Brown’s daughter, 18, was treated for a “stress-related condition” and released.

Houston has been known to suffer addiction issues with alcohol, cocaine and prescription drugs.

We send our condolences to the Houston family.

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Entertainment

Beyonce and Jay-Z Post Blue Ivy Carter Photos

Meet mini-Beyonce, Blue Ivy Carter.

The very first photos of Beyonce’s daughter with Jay-Z, baby Blue Ivy, have been revealed.

Jay-Z shared the private family photos on his website, Lifeandtimes.com.

His message:

The end – of privacy that is.

Photos of the infant are now making their way through the interwebs.  Blue Ivy looks adorable too.  With a full head of hair, baby girl looks just like mommy and daddy.  Beyonce is beaming while Jay-Z looks like a proud papa.

Blue Ivy is already a superstar… the infant’s voice has already been heard on her father’s song, “Glory”.  Yes, her cries were featured on the song that Jay-Z released just two days after she was born.

Beyonce and Jay-Z are even trying to trademark their daughter’s name, filing paperwork to protect the name Blue Ivy Carter in case they want to release a line of products under her name.

A little much?  Do you feel this child is already blessed or are her parents going to be over-the-top?

 

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Celebrities

Divorce in Hollywood: Why Celebrity Marriages Don’t Last

Seal and Heidi Klum, Russell Brand and Katy Perry, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore… and the list goes on and on.

Let’s not forget the 72-day farce of a marriage that was Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries.

Celebrity marriages keep falling apart… they just don’t work!  Why don’t Hollywood marriages last?

“Unfortunately in this town (Hollywood) divorces are a dime a dozen and there are several reasons why,” says Michael Kelly, a divorce attorney in Beverly Hills, California.

“In my experience, having represented many high-stakes celebrity divorces frequent failure to agree on who takes care of the children instead of their career, infidelity and insecurities, divergent career paths, PR-scandals, and unequal income and unequal projects are some of the most common factors of why many celebrity marriages don’t last.”

You’d think that celebrities would be smart enough to be prepared when entering such a commitment.  If you ever wonder why these celebrity divorces get so complicated, surprisingly many celebrities don’t sign prenuptial agreements.

“Many make large amounts of money in a short amount of time without an adequate financial plan.  Taxes, distribution or sharing of assets, and failure to plan drastically complicate a divorce,” says Kelly.

Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore

“All of these things combined make celebrity divorces much more complicated than the average.”

All the fame, fortune and success don’t seem to enough to hold some of these couples together.  I often wonder if it’s due to boredom; sad to say but when you have it all and can buy anything, how spoiled have you become that you are bored with one relationship and wish to find something new?

On the other hand, with Ashton and Demi, Ashton’s infidelity was reason for Demi to divorce.  But in Heidi Klum and Seal’s case, the couple reportedly split amicably – why not work harder to keep their marriage together then?

Then you look at those Hollywood marriages that have lasted.  There are few that’s for sure but let’s take Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie – are they solid?

“The Pitt-Jolie marriage has actors with equal careers, equal assets, shared child rearing tasks, and good planning.  These are some of the reasons that their marriage has lasted.”

So perhaps A-listers should date A-listers?  If an A-list actor marries a D-list actor, there may be some animosity and jealousy perhaps with respect to career and finances… interesting thought.

“It takes special love, open communication and planning to make a normal marriage work.  In celebrity divorces the extreme pressures of career add a very difficult element.”

 

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