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by Sarah Fader

The other day, friend of mine posted on Facebook about how said she was saddened about the death of Amanda, the girl who committed suicide due to bullying. I hadn’t heard about the story, so I did a little research and found out that the girl in question was Amanda Todd.

She was 15 years old, lived in Canada, and had been severely mocked and bullied. On October 10th 2012, she took her own life.

I watched Amanda’s video. In her YouTube Video, Amanda doesn’t speak at all. She is seen from the nose down, and instead of talking, she holds up white pieces of paper with black marker written on them that tell her story.

She reveals that she met a man in a chat room when she was in the 7th grade, and he threatened her. If she didn’t “put on a show” for him, he would send a picture of her breasts to everyone that she knew. She was humiliated, tortured, and bullied by her peers.

One card Amanda holds up reveals this statement: “They said I hope she sees this and kills herself”.

Amanda resorted to self-mutilation, and was ostracized by her peers and her community. Ultimately, the pain was so deep that she took her own life.

This story highlights the fact that bullying in the 21st century has reached a whole new level. It involves the complex vortex of the internet.

When I was in junior high school, I was severely bullied. I woke up every day terrified to go to school. My heart palpitated uncontrollably at the thought that I would have to see those two girls (who I was once friends with) that now made every day in 8th grade a living hell. I’m still traumatized when I think about what I went through.

But I survived; Amanda Todd did not.

What we must be aware of is that with the advent of the internet, bullying has reached an entirely new level. We need to start closely monitoring what our children are up to online. We need to have open communication with our kids about what is safe and what is dangerous in the virtual universe. Our children are in danger if we don’t talk about these matters.

The story of Amanda Todd is a model of what we don’t want to happen to our own children.

Rest in peace, Amanda, your story should be shared as a message that bullying, if not stopped, can have dire consequences.

 

Why we need more empathy.

 

Sarah Fader blogs about her life on Old School New School Mom. She also runs blog workshops for elementary school children in New York City and provides freelance transcription services for major television networks. She has two beautiful children, Ari and Samara.

Lately I’ve been thinking about aging, my own mortality… call it a mid-life crisis if you will.

When I look at the calendar and see the years passing by, I know I’m getting older by age – but I still feel the same inside.

Often I’m still that little school girl who gets excited about the little things. When someone at a store calls me ma’am, I’m still startled. Maybe I’m simply in denial. But maybe I still feel young inside.

by Shannon Lintott

Fall is in the air. As the weather turns colder and the couch is calling you back once again, it is time to head to the theatres to turn to movies for escape from the falling leaves and the coming snow.

New fall releases like Looper, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Master, Hotel Transylvania and The Other Dream Team are already in the theatres and are worth a watch but here is a list of the 15 most promising and/or exciting releases that will hit the big screen this fall (title followed by the release date):

Taken 2 (October 5)

Frankenweenie (October 5)

V/H/S (October 5)

Argo (October 12)

Seven Psychopaths (October 12)

Cloud Atlas (October 26)

Wreck it Ralph (November 2)

The Man with the Iron Fists (November 2)

Skyfall (November 9)

Lincoln (November 9)

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (November 16)

Anna Karenina (November 16)

Silver Linings Playbook (November 23)

Life of Pie (November 23)

Shannon LintottShannon Lintott works in events as a production coordinator and spends her free time exploring the internet, taking photographs, reading or watching movies.  Visit her movie review blog I Like (good) Movies and follow her on Twitter.


by Samantha Montpetit-Huynh

I heard something on the news today – if turkey makes you sleepy, carrots make you see better and spinach makes you strong, what makes you lose weight?

Eating properly, watching food portions and burning more calories than you take in does. It’s not rocket science but the whole weight loss dilemma continues to plague people year after year.

Once the weather gets a bit cooler and the holiday season begins, the primary focus is family and food – a ridiculous amount of food and for some insane reason our coping mechanisms go AWOL. We drink and we gorge just to later lie on the couch and say, “Why did I do that? Again?”

But let’s be realistic. It’s not going to stop anytime soon. If you’re like me you will say, “I’m NEVER doing that again!” Right.

How about instead, accepting what you have done and starting fresh? A few holiday pounds never hurt anyone. It only begins to hurt when you allow the holiday “cheer” to domino and you don’t nip it in the bud!


Here’s a few sure fire ways to getting back on track and losing those pounds in just a couple weeks:

1. Out with the old and in with the new. If you did a good job of eating over Thanksgiving, there was no shortage of sweets available and you have had your share. The cravings (hopefully) are gone and you probably feel a bit blah. Make a commitment of sugar abstinence and try keeping it for a week. Doing this mini sugar “cleanse” of sorts will help to stop additional fat storage, lower your blood sugar levels and alleviate bloating especially around the middle.

2. Drink LOADS of water. Water makes things move; good and bad. If you have taken a lot of crap in, it needs to go.

3. Up your workout routine. An oldie but a goodie. Burn more calories than you take in. By adding one more day per week or an additional 10 minutes to each workout, you increase the overall calories burned and temporarily increase your metabolic rate.

4. Remove 500 calories per day from your diet. Did you know that 3,500 calories = 1 lb. of fat? If you remove 500 per day, by the end of the week, you have lost one pound. Sweet.

In general, if you want to rid yourself of the couple of pound that crept on, there will need to be somewhat of a sacrifice to get it off. But remember, it’s only temporary as long as you go back to eating well and saving the “holiday eating” for the holidays.

 

Samantha Montpetit-HuynhSamantha Montpetit-Huynh is the mother of two beautiful girls and the founder of Core Expectations, Toronto’s only full services wellness team that delivers personal training, abdominal rehabilitation and other support services to the homes and offices of pregnant women and new moms across the GTA.

by Darlene Morrison

Since having children, I’ve always been battling weight loss and having the “perfect” body again.

Carrying the last pregnancy, twins in fact, I had gained almost 50 pounds, although you couldn’t tell it by looking at me so much! After two years of running around with my twins and being so busy with raising four young children, my husband and I both decided that it was about time to lose weight and get back to eating healthy.

Well, my twins are almost five years old now and it is still something I am working on. They always say you don’t gain weight overnight and you cannot lose it overnight either. Isn’t that the truth!

We signed ourselves up for a gym membership, some personal training sessions and we were off! The results were phenomenal and my husband and I probably both lost about twenty pounds each over a year’s time.

We had started a clean eating lifestyle – nothing white, nothing processed and nothing packaged. We lasted on this quite some time before we went back to eating the same way we had before. We still continued eating whole wheat and all the whole grains that we had already implemented and still continue to drink skim milk.

After a summer of eating poorly, I finally sat down yesterday for a couple of hours and planned out a healthy week meal plan for a family of six.

I had all of the notes and handouts from the nutritionist that I had seen at the gym in the past as well as some recipes I had printed off from the internet for school lunch ideas. With my pen and paper, I planned a menu for one week and we will duplicate the same menu for my second week also.

I have recently stopped running (due to laziness mainly) but coupled with this and possibly my low thyroid condition coming back again, I had noticed I was gaining weight. I also took into count that I ate terribly throughout the summer with many carbohydrate filled foods, like burgers, hotdogs, corn on the cob to name a few.

I had noticed that I quite often had a dull stomach ache. After having a BBQ with friends and eating processed burgers with white buns, potato salad (yummy), and corn on the cob, I went to bed early with some Pepto Bismol because I had a sore tummy and even worse than the usual dull ache I had been experiencing.

At that point, I had talked many times about getting back to our eating clean diet but just hadn’t made the time to sit down and get it planned. After the barbecue night, I knew that I finally had to make the change and get back to a healthy and nutritious meal plan for the entire family.

After two hours of sitting in front of computer, with a pen and paper and nutrition handouts, I planned our menu.

meal plan for weight loss, meal planning


My menu does not show the snacks that I have planned for the children’s school lunches but I’ll pack them:

  • grapes (red and green)
  • cheese strings
  • celery with cream cheese and raisins (ants on a log)
  • a yogurt fruit salad (strawberry yogurt mixed with cantaloupe, grapes, strawberries)
  • cheese and crackers
  • apples

 

Since I have started this better eating menu and have gotten back to my running, I feel much better and have lost a total of 8.5 lbs  in a month!

It is very rewarding to have your children eating a healthy breakfast, lunch and dinner and teaching them how to make nutritious choices.

What are you doing to eat healthy?

Darlene Morrison is a mother of four who resides in Newmarket, Ontario with her family. She loves cooking, running, reading and writing.

“To witness the birth of a child is our best opportunity
to experience the meaning of the word miracle.”

If I could do it all over again, I would have had a photographer take photos of both of my sons births. At the time, I probably wouldn’t have wanted close-ups of my distorted face as I heaved and held my breath, pushing like a mad woman to “get this baby out!!!”

Looking back, it would have been so absolutely wonderful to have someone there just to take pictures. Candid snapshots of the process – to tell the amazing, miraculous story of how my beautiful boys came to be.

Hyla Gallo and her husband decided to hire birth photographer, Tunde Duncan of TNy Photography to capture the birth of their son, Gavin.

Here is an interview with both Hyla and Tunde:

1. What made you decide to hire a birth photographer?

I really wanted to be able to look back and re-live those precious moments. Everything happens so fast it’s hard to remember the exact emotions that were felt. I love the beauty and power labour brings to a woman and wanted to capture it forever. Sure my husband could have taken OK photographs but I wanted him there to fully support me and enjoy the labour and delivery with out being distracted by a camera. Hiring a photographer was the best decision I could have made. My photographs tell an amazing story that I will never forget!

2. How did it feel like having someone capture the most private moments of your experience on camera?

During my labour and delivery, I really didn’t notice there being a camera as I was just really focused on myself. Tunde was also very unobtrusive and almost seemed like another support person. When you’re in active labour I don’t think it really matters who’s in the room

3. Would you recommend to other moms or couples to hire a photographer for this special and private occasion?

I would without a doubt recommend other birthing couples to hire a photographer to capture this miraculous event. The moment They look back at their beautifully documented story they’ll know why. When my photographer showed me a sneak peak of my labour and sweet baby boy, I immediately felt the wonderful emotions that I had felt the day he was born! It was truly an incredible experience.

Images of the birth session and a slide show of Gavin’s Birth

 

What is the demand like for birth photographers?

Hiring a photographer for your baby’s birth is the latest trend, the demand is definitely there. Birth photography is becoming popular in Canada and it is a booming business in the United States. Hiring a birth photographer means dad can focus on supporting mom and enjoying the special moments with her.  Many years ago dad had to wait outside during a birth, then he was allowed in to snap some photos, and now mom want to hire a photographer to captures those very special moments in the birthing room. Couples may want very explicit images, or they might not want pictures taken showing all the glory details. To me, capturing the emotions are very important, and getting shots that are discreet and can be shared with family and friends.

What is your favorite thing about photographing births?

This was my very first birth session. My favorite moment was capturing of course the baby being born. Seeing the emotions on the mother’s face, the affection between the husband and his wife, how supportive and caring everybody was. Words cannot describe how truly wonderful these few hours were for me. It was amazing to be part of something so intimate, capturing those very special moments where a baby, a little miracle is being born. It is very emotional for both the mom and family and the photographer. I am excited to say that I will be offering birth session in 2013.

 

 

Do you have the “mommy gene”?

In a study with mice, researchers at the Rockefeller University in New York found that a single gene exists that could be responsible for the maternal instincts that motivate mothers to raise their young.

Are you born to be a mom? A gene for maternal instincts?

The study’s findings mean there could be real proof as to why some women seem born to be maternal figures, or have that maternal instinct, while others don’t “feel” it as easily.

You know how some women feel that biological clock ticking or stomping, while others don’t feel it at all?

One of the lead researchers asserted that “without this gene, the skills to be ‘a good mom’ [are] lost.”

The findings of this study are interesting but already I see a red flag.  Is this yet another way to label moms?

The term “mommy gene” is already coined… I can see the conversations already. “Oh, she doesn’t have the mommy gene like I do.”

Or “she’s not a natural at being a mom – she probably doesn’t have the mom gene.”

And so on.

Women looking to one day have a child of her own will now start to doubt herself – what if she’s not motherly enough? What if she doesn’t feel the clock ticking?

There are already enough pressures that come with being a mom – do we really need to add more?

Picking apples, wearing wellies, family photos at the pumpkin patch… hot apple cider, fresh pumpkin pie… what’s not to love about autumn?

It’s truly my favourite time of the year. Weekends in October are meant to be outdoors, enjoying the cool crisp weather and taking in all the beautiful colours nature has to offer.

Make sure you take the family out to visit some of the best orchards, farms and pumpkin patches around. Our favourite orchard is closed this year due to frost this spring which ruined their apples.

Here are some of the best places to visit this fall around the Greater Toronto Area:

Organics Farm

Organics Farm is a certified organic pick your own apple orchard. There is also an on-site bakery and market where they sell baked goods, meat and other products from their farm.

19th Avenue Farm

Fresh vegetables are abundant… we bought bushels of tomatoes from this farm for the first time this year and the sauce came out so tasty and thick. Squash are abundant now – I made jars of butternut squash soup for the winter.

Forsythe Family Farms

Each weekend in October is Festival Time at Forsythe Family Farms at Major Mackenzie and Kennedy Road in Markham.  Enjoy two farmyard playgrounds with lots of room for the kids to run, a tricycle track, farm animals to visit, a hayloft to jump in and a tractor and train to play on. Great photo opps too for kids and the pumpkin patch.

Pine Farms Orchard

Pine Farms Orchard in King City offer apple picking, a café, tours and this perfect oversized Muskoka chair for photos. Apple picking was slim this fall but it’s still a great place to visit for the kids.

Country Apple Orchard Farms

It’s apple picking time at Country Apple Orchard Farm in King City although many varieties suffered because of the frost this past spring. Northern Spy apples are ready now – hopefully not all gone!

Brooks Farms

Brooks farms is located near Mount Albert, such a lovely drive from the city. They have pumpkin picking and hayrides for the kids and more.

Applewood Farm

Applewood Farm has been in the Passafiume family for over forty years. It began as one of the first pick your own strawberry and apple farms in Stouffville, Ontario. True to it’s name, Applewood Farm remains the most popular spot in the area to pick fresh strawberries, or spend a breezy afternoon picking apples.

Round the Bend Farm

Round the Bend Farm is a working family farm that sells seasonal fruits, vegetables, flowers, as well as naturally grown turkeys. Visit the farm yard and play in the straw maze, climb the straw mountain and explore the corn maze.

Apple Factory

Once you step foot inside the Apple Factory in Brampton, Ontario, you’ll immediately be hit by the lovely aroma of freshly baked pies from the oven.  They are famous for their fruit pies.  Of course apple is my favourite but they have a huge selection.  They also carry a bunch of jams, jellies, preserves, fudge, real ice cream, fresh bread, cookies, tarts and more.

More farm listings

by Christy Laverty

It’s October and now officially the second month of the new school year.

September was a bit of a whirlwind for me.  I always find back to school time a bit of a chaotic time of year, so much to do and everyone is working to get back into some kind of a routine. Routine is a good thing but boy, oh boy, is it hard to back into the swing of things.

If you are anything like me during the summer I let all sense of routine fly out the window; we eat dinner late, the kids go to bed late, and we get up in the morning late.

When school starts it is a shock to our systems.  To be honest, I am not sure my system has recovered yet.

We are still struggling with the back to school routine but I am happy to say, I think we have only been late for school once this year! Not bad for us!

Here are just five things to help you get into a routine and simple ways to get organized!

1.  Be Organized

This is something I often struggle with. It is so much easier to figure out what you need to do when you actually know what you need to do.

Have a central spot for school notices, backpacks and anything school related. It is also helpful to have a calendar posted with important dates and appointments. I am old-school because I like a paper calendar up where I can see it all in a glance. I mark many appointments in my phone but an in-your-face calendar is easier to keep track of stuff, especially in the morning when I am packing up school lunches.

2.  Be Prepared

This goes hand in hand with being organized. In our house we struggle with this one too.  I find it is easier to get ready in the morning if the kids have clothes, including underwear and socks, picked up the night before. It doesn’t always happen but the idea is there. It is still a work in progress.

Packing the majority of lunches the night before makes mornings easier too! It is important to have the kids get all their school stuff, like homework, home books and library books organized and in their backpacks.  Have permission forms signed the night before too!

3.  Think Ahead, Work Ahead

Marking things down in the calendar is essential if you are going to be successful in this step. It is so much easier to work ahead on things, like birthday parties, school projects for the kids and field trips.

If you know things are coming up then you can start to work toward getting everything you need. There is nothing more stressful I find than scrambling the day of or the morning of an event.

4.  Don’t Do Too Much – Moms this is for you!

I am guilty of this. I try to do it all and let’s face it that just isn’t realistic. There is no way one person can be responsible for everything and get it all done.

Delegate! Get the kids to do some of the work.  Kids can start at an early age setting out clothes, helping to pack their lunches, getting shoes, boots, mitts and scarves ready for when they need them. Kids want to help so let them!

5.  Be Kind To You!

As Moms we tend to get stressed about all the things that need to be done and when we forget something we can be pretty hard on ourselves. It’s that Mom Guilt thing. You know about that right? Of course you do! No stop it! Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be kind to yourself.

You are important and shouldn’t be the last one on your list. Treat yourself well and then you will be in much better shape to help everyone else in your life!

How do you get organized/into a routine?

Christy Laverty is a mother and an editor for a Toronto all news radio station. She also does freelance writing for several parenting magazines. Visit Christy’s blog where she updates the trials, tribulations, and fun of being mom of two beautiful girls.

by Cathy B.

Guests coming over? Need to make a simple meal for Thanksgiving?

When you don’t have time to babysit your meal, all you have to do is throw a smoked ham in the crock pot and in 2½ hours, it’s good to go. Yes, it’s really that easy!

Here’s my simple easy recipe for slow cooker ham:

Ingredients:

3 lbs.      Cooked/Smoked boneless ham  *NOTE: Get a ham that has the least amount of sodium!

1/2 cup packed brown sugar

2 tbsp.  orange juice (frozen concentrated is best)

3 tbsp.  fresh lemon juice

1 tbsp. mustard

2/3 cup water

Instructions:

Place all ingredients in a crock pot on high for 2½ hours. When you serve the ham, make sure to drizzle your tangy citrus sauce over top. Use an electric knife to cut into slices.

Serve with mashed potatoes and coleslaw.