by Danielle Christopher

I settle my two and four-year-old hungry daughters at the last available Starbucks table. I dish out the treats and pull out their waters from my bag. I sit myself in between them and exhale out loud.  It might be more relaxing to be at home playing foxy bingo, but it is always nice to get out with the children as well.  Sipping my coffee, I spy a very pregnant lady sitting at the table beside us looking at my girls.

I remember all too well that feeling of wanting to have the baby out. It’s the comments that came from random strangers that hurt the worst.

Some of what I was told was:

You are so huge!

Better get your sleep now.

It’s just a myth you eat for two.

Is what you are eating good for the baby?

Both third trimesters were spent in extreme hot summers, everywhere I went: It must suck in this heat for you. (DUH!)

When all the while I ultimately wished I had said: “Don’t touch my belly unless I can touch yours!”

Since being a mom twice over, I feel a kinship to seeing expectant moms. My oldest knows to go open a door of a struggling mom. Nowadays, when I see a pregnant mom I say things that I wished I heard more of, like:

You look beautiful.

You are glowing.

You don’t look pregnant.

Your baby is lucky to have you as a mom

My girls finish their snacks and declare its play time. I pack us up and see the lady looking sad as she rubs her belly.

I catch her eye and smile, “ Congratulations. You look amazing.” She beams a wary smile. “Really?” she asks hopefully. I nod emphatically.

Smile and pass it on is how we can support moms at all stages of parenthood.

Had I known that the baby stage would pass so quickly I would have hung onto it tighter. Having said that my youngest gives my legs a bear hug.  I love this present.

What are some positive and negative comments you received while pregnant?

Danielle Christopher is a stay-at-home mom of two daughters, ages one and three.  She blogs for The Momoir Project and writes book reviews for Women’s Post.  Her teen story is in the collection “Parent/Teen Stories: Without Judgement”.  She lives with her husband of seventeen years and her girls in Langley, B.C..   Follow her on Twitter.