Written by an Anonymous Mom

December should be a really fun month but it’s not. My confession is that I kind of hate Christmas.

OK maybe hate is a strong word but I guess I just dislike the holidays. I dread this time of the year because of all the stress involved and when I even start to think about the fact that I have to basically do all the preparations for Christmas. I get overwhelmed just thinking about it.

I work part time and have three kids… Every year, I’m the one who will be doing the decorating and the shopping and the baking and the wrapping. My husband works 10 or 11 hours a day so he’s too tired to do anything when he gets home and I don’t expect him to help out much with baking and decorating anyway.

Then thinking about the shopping that has to be done. I know I will be stressing out to find gifts for everyone and it’s not like I have a lot of money to spend anyway so I have to get really creative or buy things that are sale. I hate the crowds at the mall too.

And then I start thinking about where we’re going to celebrate Christmas and I get even more stressed. Who is going to host the family supper this year? Do I feel even like celebrating with all the aunts and uncles and cousins?

I am very tempted to forget about spending it and pleasing everyone else and do our own thing alone. Then the guilt comes in – is that really fair to the kids?

Then I start to feel like the Scrooge. Bah hambug.

It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year but I guess I am just really tired and run down and i don’t want to deal with all the Christmas STRESS.

Am I alone? Do you hate Christmas too?

Author

Maria Lianos-Carbone is the author of “Oh Baby! A Mom’s Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year”, and publisher of amotherworld.com, a leading lifestyle blog for women.

8 Comments

  1. Dianne / Smilenwaven Reply

    I’ve pretty much always thought that way… NOT my fav holiday! BUT… as I’m sure all Mom’s do the same – come Christmas morning it’s ALL good and always made it the best day ever for DS! Merry &%$^* Christmas lol

  2. 100% agree! My husband called me the Grinch last week because I didn’t help put the tree up with the kids. That’s because I was in the crazy mall shopping for all the kids gifts on his side of the family and mine. I have 3 kids of my own and hate the stress and lack of funds. Seems like everyone wants cash, gift cards and iGadgets! I feel every year it’s all about want want want but no one remembers the true meaning of Chritmas.

  3. I agree. Christmas got so much better for us when we changed the way we did things. It was a hard move initially but we don’t regret it (only time will tell how this works as our son gets older though). We traded in buying lots of presents for buying gift aid instead, and told others to do the same for us (buying and wrapping issue solved!) We traded Christmas cards for Christmas phone-calls. We got a small, rather sad looking tree and made a joke of it – we go all out decorating it and trying to make it look good (tree up and decorated in 10 minutes!) We spray paint pine cones, look for fun decorations to make, indulge in traditional sights and smells like nuts, berries, candles, snuggling under cosy blankets, reading books, wrapping up warm and going for walks, watching a family film, enjoying a glass or two of Irish cream (for us obviously), playing Christmas music, visiting the arboretum. Sometimes we visit family, sometimes we Skype them instead. We used to try and please everyone and Christmas was no fun. Now it is, we just had to shrug of the massive amounts of pressure that had somehow piled up.

    Or you could consider this instead – these trees don’t take much decorating 🙂 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Festivus

  4. I agree! I’m a mother of 4 teenage/young adult, 5 counting my husband. I also feel overwhelmed with menu planning, cleaning, shopping, wrapping gifts and so on. And then everyone wonders why I’m a B….H, and I feel guilty about my grumpiness, ruining everyone’s ‘wonderful Christmas”….. as I head back into kitchen to prepare meals. I suppose once Christmas morning arrives it is nice, but I agree there is a lot of stress for the mother putting it all together.

  5. Amy Ledesma Reply

    I was raised in a household that didnt celebrate Christmas . When I reached adulthood and married my husband and we had a huge fight that left me scratching my head. While I knew we were young and broke .I figured after we paid the rent and lights maybe we would bake something and go visit his parents and 5 siblings. He was mad. He said we cant go without gifts.Even if it meant the rent? Even if it meant the lights? YEP . Right then it left a bad taste in my mouth.If you do not have the money then what? Go in debt? He was going to try to pay the bills late and say its christmas to the landlord.It floored me.

  6. Thank you for being brave enough to post this. I’m a mother of five and cringe all year at the thought of December. I’m trying so hard to make the Holiday’s wonderful for my family, but I feel such dread. I too love Christmas Day, but the lead up is killing me and it’s only Dec 1st.

  7. I am not a parent but the holidays are still worrisome for me too. Also, despite the fact that I made that very personal choice not to have children, my family sees fit to criticize me at every turn. I do distance myself from them from time to time but the guilt always does me in. I used to enjoy the holidays but because of financial difficulties, it’s just not fun any more. I have suggested not exchanging gifts, participating in a Secret Santa exchange or donating to charity (despite our financial difficulties, we could all be doing far worse than some). My family has soundly rejected all of these ideas. They have expensive taste, even down to the wrapping paper. As much as I want to spend time with family, the stress and headaches are not really worth it. I know that they will not be here forever, and I know I am far more patient and supportive to them than they are to me, but it’s not enough. I just don’t know how to stand my ground and say I don’t want to participate. My mom would take it hard and make me feel guilty (and I’m still trying to work through that and stand behind my own decisions and thoughts and opinions).

  8. I hate Christmas more and more every year. We have to go to my mother in laws house for both christmas eve and christmas. It takes forever she’s not the greatest of company. When it’s time for us to leave on both days to my families she goes in a jealous rage. We have no time to spend with my family and it sucks because i barely seem them all year. It also gives us no time create any traditions with our kids. It sucks and I’m miserable. My more poor family is getting the short end of the stick.

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