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I Miss How Things Were Before Having a Baby

written by an anonymous mom

I miss how things were before having a baby.

I love my baby so much. She’s almost 7 months and she’s at this really fun stage where she is sitting up and smiling and laughing. She’s so adorable and I love being with her. But there are times when I miss how things were before having a baby.

I feel very blessed to be able to be home with her but sometimes I think I should be out working like so many other moms in my area. Am I making the right decision being at home with my baby girl?

My husband works a lot and travels maybe one week out of the month which makes it hard. Before my baby girl was born I would sometimes go on trips with him. We would have date nights once a week, go for dinners all the time. I’m not saying that I would want to do that all the time now because my baby girl is my life now. But I can’t say that I don’t miss those carefree days where I could come and go as I please and my husband and I could just do something spontaneous whenever we felt like it.

I miss sleeping! I sound like I’m a terrible mom but I used to love sleeping. Maybe when she gets older I’ll be able to catch up on some sleep again. I sound really cranky. Running on little sleep doesn’t help. She still wakes up during the night and I can’t hear her cry so I do get up and soothe her so she can go back to sleep so that I can get some sleep!

I know it takes time to adjust to being a new mom and I know that I’m probably just cranky and whiny so please don’t judge me.

I must sound like a horrible person but do you ever miss how things used to be before having a baby? I can’t be the only one?

Any advice for this anonymous mom?

I Miss How Things Were Before Having a Baby

Anonymous Mom Confession: “I Can’t Handle My Kids”

This was submitted by an anonymous mom – any advice is welcome.

I have two children, 5 and 2 years old. I have stayed at home since he was born. I had a rough delivery.

Afterwards, I had postpartum depression and was on medication. My husband had to take off extra days from work because I threatened to take our son back to the hospital because I didn’t want him but then I would cry uncontrollably and hug him and kiss my son.

It got a little better but then I would scream or yell at him. I would get so mad or enraged that I couldn’t stand him. I would tell him I hated him; how I didn’t want him anymore; how I couldn’t stand him! I would push him down or hit him harder or spank him harder than I should. Then afterward would cry and beg for his forgiveness.

I pray that God would just kill me because I couldn’t handle being a mom. I love my children but they just know what buttons to press. I just can’t seem to help it sometimes.

I’m still taking medication. Have been diagnosed with PTSD after having a rough childhood. My dad hit me three times in my life and I feel that I’ve turned into him.

I know have two children and sometimes I want more but then I think I can’t even handle the ones I have or want them!! I have even looked into having myself admitted to a mental institution!

I just have no clue what to do! I probably should never had had children but I do love them at times.

Mom Confession: “I Am Not Fit to Be a Mother”

I am a mother of a 19 month old girl. I broke it off with her father about a year ago, and have been dating a new guy for almost 4 months.

I realized a while ago I am in love with him, but I can’t bring myself to tell him for fear of rejection. I actually think he is probably going to break up with me.

I get 2 or 3 days off per week when my ex takes my daughter, and usually take that time to see him. Practically every parent I know (including my mother) judges me harshly for having that much time away from my daughter. I feel like I can’t be a good parent when I do have her as I am swimming in debt and always living paycheck to paycheck.

I don’t do anything anymore; I mostly just lay in bed and let my daughter do whatever. When I don’t have her I clean the house and get drunk. I have been trying to drink less, actually succeeding for the most part, but I still find I want more time off.

I am shutting everybody out, and having a hard time expressing any sort of love to anyone around me. Sometimes I think I don’t have it in me to love.

I wish I didn’t bring a child into a world where I knew I wouldn’t stay with the father, and knew I don’t have the skills and experience to provide more than basic necessities.

I have been crying for two days straight and my boyfriend is ignoring me. I don’t want to go to counselling since I know exactly what they will say. I have been in counselling for years in the past and already have the skills to help myself, but I just can’t. I want to run away from everything and start fresh in another city, far away.

I feel like I am only hurting my daughter by continuing to be the person I am. I am not fit to be a mother. I know I am selfish, but I feel like I am bringing myself furthur into depression if I continue trying to sacrifice my own happiness for my daughters.

I have attempted suicide in the past, and can feel myself headed in that direction. I don’t know what to do. I am posting this here because I know if I told anyone I know how I feel, they would judge me even more or send me to the psych ward to be fed anti-depressants and chemicals that I know don’t work for me.

I just need someone to give me feedback. Any feedback. I know a lot will be negative, but at least it will be from people who don’t know me personally.

I just need something.

Confession: I Hate Christmas

Written by an Anonymous Mom

December should be a really fun month but it’s not. My confession is that I kind of hate Christmas.

OK maybe hate is a strong word but I guess I just dislike the holidays. I dread this time of the year because of all the stress involved and when I even start to think about the fact that I have to basically do all the preparations for Christmas. I get overwhelmed just thinking about it.

I work part time and have three kids… Every year, I’m the one who will be doing the decorating and the shopping and the baking and the wrapping. My husband works 10 or 11 hours a day so he’s too tired to do anything when he gets home and I don’t expect him to help out much with baking and decorating anyway.

Then thinking about the shopping that has to be done. I know I will be stressing out to find gifts for everyone and it’s not like I have a lot of money to spend anyway so I have to get really creative or buy things that are sale. I hate the crowds at the mall too.

And then I start thinking about where we’re going to celebrate Christmas and I get even more stressed. Who is going to host the family supper this year? Do I feel even like celebrating with all the aunts and uncles and cousins?

I am very tempted to forget about spending it and pleasing everyone else and do our own thing alone. Then the guilt comes in – is that really fair to the kids?

Then I start to feel like the Scrooge. Bah hambug.

It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year but I guess I am just really tired and run down and i don’t want to deal with all the Christmas STRESS.

Am I alone? Do you hate Christmas too?

How is Your Sex Life Moms?

Let’s talk about sex!

How is your sex life?

Be honest – describe how it is these days?  How often are you having sex (or not)?

Are you fulfilled?  What do you think could make it better?

You can answer anonymously in 100 words or less here.  Fill out the form to submit your “sex confession”.  There is no way to track back to you so don’t worry.  It might be used in an upcoming post, anonymously of course.

 

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