by Min Schmidt

Last evening during dinner with a group of mates, I found myself proclaiming, “If you aren’t polite to waiters, I will not be your friend.” They laughed at this but little did they realize that I was dead serious.

In my personal blog, I once wrote in all uppercase letters: “MY FUTURE CHILDREN WILL BE POLITE AS SOON AS THEY ARE ABLE TO SPEAK.” I think if you vow something about your future offspring in all caps for all the blogosphere to see you need to be taken seriously…or to an insane asylum.

My friends were gossiping about a mutual acquaintance of ours who made a young waitress burst into tears the last time they went out to lunch. She made a complaint about every little thing and sent her food back twice.

When it came out the final time, she sniffed it and said, “It smells like kitchen floor.” Guess what, honey? It probably was a mixture of kitchen floor, spit and who knows what else. Not that I ever did that…

One of my greatest grievances is seeing a customer being rude to a waiter at a restaurant. I have felt this way long before I even became a waitress during my college years and it is even further instilled in me today. I am a huge believer in having good manners and I consider this to be applicable to absolutely every single person I encounter in my life.

Some people have the horrible misconception that a person who serves them is also beneath them. A waiter’s job may be to take your order and bring you your meal but they are just trying to make a living, just like you.

I am very particular about the phrasing of words when placing an order with your server. I think the proper way to order something is to use the words: “May I please have the (insert food item here)? Thank you!” I don’t know what it is about the phrase: “I’ll have the (insert food item here)” that makes me cringe.

If you think your dish would benefit from a little more salt, you shouldn’t say, “I need salt” when the waiter comes by to check on you. Instead, ask for more salt and ask politely. Then, don’t forget to reply with a thank you.

You have to be incredibly thick skinned to work in the food industry, which is why I only lasted a miserable year as a waitress. I have learned that servers are blamed for many things that are beyond their control. If your dish is not as delicious as the description on the menu made it seem, that is the kitchen’s fault, not your server’s.

If your water isn’t refilled as often as you would like, your server may be handling more tables than they should because of a short staff. Don’t assume that they are just chit chatting in the back with others. If the restaurant is out of salmon, blame the person who keeps inventory.

I strongly believe that a person who is not nice to a waiter is probably not a nice person in general. Can we please teach this to our children and maybe a few adults out there who feel entitled to absolutely everything?

Did you just realize that you are someone who I would refuse to be friends with? Here are a few things you can do to make your server’s day:

Stack up your dirty plates and utensils at the end of your meal.

Write “thank you” on your credit card receipt.

Remember your server’s name and use it in your conversations with him/her.

Smile.

This is a guest post from Min Schmidt who shares her shopping advice and life experience at Savoo, the U.K.-based version of the popular deal site, Savings.com.