Finding time to spend with your husband can be pretty difficult when you’re juggling kids, housework and a job, but finding the energy to really spend time with your husband can be even harder. Thanks to exhaustion, ruts and libidos, sex just isn’t the same after kids.

In fact, Netmums reported that 78% of couples have less sex now that they’ve had children. But you don’t have to be a part of the statistic.

It’s time to take charge and get the two of you back in the mood and back in bed. Use these five tips to spice up your bedroom and help you break out of your sexual rut!

1. Maximize your morning time.

Save time by showering together in the morning and share a few intimate moments together before the day has really begun. This is a great way to not only conserve water, but to also get in a quickie. Help your husband get suds up and then surprise him with so much more.

You’ll feel closer, refreshed and a little more awake then usual.

2. Introduce something new.

It might be time to introduce some props if you have found that your sack sessions have become a little lack luster and a whole lot of routine. Introducing a toy into your bedroom can help reignite things and achieve all sorts of new sensations that the two of you may have never explored before. Hop over to Adam and Eve and pick out a toy that you and your husband can both enjoy and surprise him the next time you’re going at it. If you’re looking for a little inspiration, you can try watching adult videos together. From there, you can role play and try out new positions and themes.

3. Change of scenery.

Getting a hotel room is a great idea, but isn’t always feasible especially when you have kids who need be looked after. Minimize the cost of date night by staying in. Drop the kids off with a neighbor, family member or baby sitter and then head back home. Have a glass of wine and make out like teenagers on your couch and then see which rooms in your house can spark your interest. Hit up every room but the bedroom. Changing a small component of your sex life, like location, can make the big difference so make the most of it!

4. Change of Dress.

Let’s face it, we don’t dress up like we used to. Date night gets a little attention, but on the whole, it’s just not the same. And it’s understandable, but even if we don’t have time for the full face of make up, heels and skirts during the day, it doesn’t mean we can’t put on something sexy at night. Put the sweats down and go to bed in a sexy piece of lingerie. It takes literally the same amount of time and it will make you feel more confident and empowered. And of course your husband won’t mind. It’s a powerful way to say, “Let’s do this,” without ever saying a word.

5. Rise and shine.

As mentioned above, you should try to share a shower together, but if you have a little more time, try for morning sex! Shift your bedroom antics to the morning and you’ll find that you have twice as much energy throughout the day and are in a much better mood. You’re also much more likely to have sex, whereas at night you both might be too tired to do anything. Set your clocks for 30 minutes earlier than you usually wake up and spend it talking, cuddling and spoiling each other. The time change might be tough, but it will certainly be worth it.

Need more tips to spice up your sex life? Check out our 15 tips to get in the mood.


Maria Lianos-Carbone is the author of “Oh Baby! A Mom’s Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year”, and publisher of, a leading lifestyle blog for women.

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