I can’t believe that soon enough, I’m going to have “the talk” with my son about puberty!

The first question is, when should we start talking to our kids about body changes and what they can expect to happen during puberty?

Our kids today are exposed to so much on television, magazines, music videos and the internet about sex and male-female relationships that they may already understand some “adult” topics. But talking about puberty is an important job for parents to do with their children.

Although curriculum may cover sex education in school, you may want to already be having the conversation with your children and answering their important questions. You can check with your Principal or teacher to see what exactly will be covered during the puberty talk but it’s helpful for girls to learn about the changes boys go through and boys learn about those affecting girls as well.

Your child may be sensitive or shy and may never ask you, unless you bring up the discussion with them first. Moms can’t avoid having the puberty talk with their daughters when they have their first period. But what about boys? They too are hitting puberty earlier than ever.

On average, girls begin puberty around 10 or 11 and boys at 11 or 12. However it’s normal to start puberty as early as 9 or 10 or as late as 15.

So when should we start talking about puberty?

tweens and puberty

It’s never too early to talk to your son and/or daughter about what to expect from puberty. It’s important to answer your kids’ questions about puberty with openness and honesty.

Experts recommend that parents should initiate the conversation. Although 8 or 9 may seem young, some boys and girls are already showing signs that puberty is around the corner. Girls’ breasts will first start to grow so when you notice your daughter’s developing chest, it’s a good time to start talking. For boys, you’ll notice their voices beginning to change or body hair appears.

Stay tuned for my next post about what you should be telling your daughter and how to make “the talk” more comfortable for mom and daughter, and read more tips about having the birds and the bees conversation.


Disclosure: I’m thrilled to be working with Always, Tampax and BeingGirl to share important information about kids and puberty!


Maria Lianos-Carbone is the author of “Oh Baby! A Mom’s Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year”, and publisher of amotherworld.com, a leading lifestyle blog for women.


  1. The reality is that most families still don’t talk openly about the topic of puberty. It can be a very confusing time for parents and kiddos alike. Especially, if parents don’t educate themselves.

    This is definitely a time to do your homework, get the facts straight and lose all traces of embarrassment. Fake it if you must because ultimately wouldn’t you rather your babies hear the “whole truth and nothing but the truth” from you?

    Sooner is *way* better than later as far as “the talk” is concerned. Puberty isn’t a one time event. It is ongoing.. for years.. for boys and girls. Keep talking! 😀

    • This is true! Parents have to educate themselves first to be prepared for the conversation! Thanks for commenting 🙂

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