by Dee Brun aka CocktailDeeva

“Let the Games Begin!”  “Letʼs get ready to RUMBLE!!!” or maybe “and in this corner…”  I don’t know! And it’s killing me!

No, I am not talking about some huge sporting event, but in my life this is a HUGE event and it has me worried and a wee bit scared. Have not felt this way since my eldest daughter’s first day of school, and here I am 10 years later having to go through it all again.

Only this time I donʼt have the control…and I NEED the control! Donʼt we all? Is this not why we become parents, to have ULTIMATE CONTROL and POWER?  Ok…I am exaggerating but really just a little.

My fabulous 14 year old daughter is starting HIGH SCHOOL in mere weeks and I am losing my shit…literally!

It has me a weee bit stressed out. All the logistics aside, bus pass, student I.D. card, uniform…and who knows what else. What about the fact that she has to take the city bus every day? Itʼs a CITY BUS! With strangers on it, and weirdos, kidnappers and sex offenders OH MY!

See this is where my mind goes, I canʼt help it. I have tried! I am not a helicopter parent, I let her have some freedoms, but my brain just pictures the absolute worst when she sets off on a new adventure. I donʼt know how to shut it off… Then after she survives all the “evil” goings on on the bus…she actually makes it to HIGH SCHOOL! Where lurking in the halls are sex starved pre-pubes-ant boys, alcohol, drugs, sex-ting, rainbow parties, pill parties.  OH MY! This is right about the time my head physically explodes off my shoulders.

How in the hell do I protect her from all of this? To all those people who say “You canʼt raise your kids in a Bubble!”, right about now is when I start searching eBay for said Bubble! I am really at a loss on this one. I am putting on the brave “She will be fine” face, but deep down , in places you donʼt talk about at parties…I AM FREAKING OUT! Itʼs not that I donʼt trust my daughter I do, I truly feel she will make good choices. I just donʼt trust everyone else. I know this is all me and that I have to let go and calm down and just stop being so CRAZY…I know all these things and tell myself this everyday, but it does nothing.

So to sum up a whole lot of, well nothing…I am just going to have to tackle this new adventure one day at a time, like a crazed control freak addict in re-hab. I am so not good with the whole not knowing what will happen thing, but will go with the flow so my daughter can suck every last ounce of enjoyment (and education) out of her High School experience. If any of you have been through this I would love your insight…and stay tuned for THE ADVENTURES OF A MOM WITH A DAUGHTER IN HIGH SCHOOL! Hmmm that is a really lame title…will have to work on that one.

Dee Brun aka Cocktail Deeva is the author of the stirring book Libations of Life, A Girls Guide to Life One Cocktail at a Time. She has combined imaginative cocktails with witty accounts of dating, carousing, dieting and simply put, the ups and downs of Life. Visit her website: www.cocktaildeeva.com

Author

Maria Lianos-Carbone is the author of “Oh Baby! A Mom’s Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year”, and publisher of amotherworld.com, a leading lifestyle blog for women.

7 Comments

  1. I have no advice to offer you Dee because my kids are still so young, but I remember being young, hugs to you! You are a great mom and I know you did a great job raising her. My mom was amazing when I was in high school, she was very open with me so I knew I could chat with her about anything.

  2. I wish I could help you, but I’m the same way. My mind always goes in that direction and since our car accident, it’s worse. It stripped away the notion that I can always keep my kids safe and left me without my blinders on. All I can say is when you need an ear, a shoulder or a friend, I’ll be there for you. I understand the crazies like nobody 🙂

  3. Smilenwaven (Dianne) Reply

    U poor thing! I can sympathize b/c I DON’T have a daughter. I KNOW I would be freaking out just like u! I only have the one DS AND it’s somehow easier w/ boys. He had to go to Guelph – the big city from Rockwood! I worried about the drugs, weapons, etc. in schools. AND the fact that he takes after me – therefore outspoken. I used to say… “Just shut your mouth – they carry guns these days.” HAPPY to report he made it thru – safe & sound AND so will your DD – in the end! xo

  4. Diane Morgan Reply

    Dee this doesnt happen to me for two years and I am already freaking out.
    It is really hard to let go even when you know they are totally awesome trustworthy and will make all the right decisions. You have it right it is everyone else around !!!!!!!!! I look forward to reading all your adventure stores about this happening in you life so hopefully it will help me when it comes to it.
    We are going to a new school this year for grade 7 and 8 which is a bit scary but we went to a different school last year too. That worked out really well for us so I keep thinking this year will be great too !!
    Just pour yourself another drink and enjoy the ride!!!!!!!!!!! 😉

  5. Sandra Kennedy Reply

    Hi Dee,

    My daughter is going into 3rd year University and as I Mom, I HEAR YA, I REALLY DO !!! I have been told by many, many people over and over again to turn it OFF but I CAN’T!! (my Son is also in highschool) So……..not sure its the right advice but what i do is suck it up – have a few rules of what i need to know (as in where are you and when are you home rules) and it seems to work pretty good. My strong advice is to be open (and trust me sometimes you get a lot of TMI, LOL) but i would rather that than nothing – my daughter tells me all the happenings still in University and I wouldn’t change it. They won’t be perfect but if they slip they will tell you (like the first drunk night) but I would rather them turn to me than anybody else. Not sure this helped but Jessie (my daughter) and I survived and are the best of friends to this date 🙂

    Good Luck or should i say – enjoy the journey!!

  6. Ann B (annbac9) Reply

    I can totally related to this post! When my DS started high school last year, I was not very stressed. I am already stressing about my DD starting high school and she is only going into grade 8!

  7. Hi :o} I am in the same situation…My daughter is starting high school this year and I am so stressed and scared that I have cried on many occasions! I know she will be fine and that she will make the right choices…but…I also remember all the peer pressure to “be cool” or to be part of the “in” crowd.. I look forward to reading your adventures and riding along with ya! I know we will all make it thru…I do, I promise :o}

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