Does your sex life need an overhaul? A little more passion?
The Naughty Bucket List: 369 Sexy Dares to do Before You Die can help bring back the spark that’s lacking in the bedroom!
Dirty word Scrabble, lunch-hour quickies, rainfall rendezvous… Church Confessional? Sounds intriguing.
I had a chance to speak to the author, Kourtney Jason, about the importance of taking sex out of the box (aka the bedroom), putting your sexual needs first and various ways of keeping the passion alive.
Why do couples get stuck in a sexual rut?
The short answer is that couples stop putting in the effort they used to. At the beginning of any relationship, sex is a new and exciting experience and exploration for both partners to learn about each other and themselves. That’s when you discover what your partner likes, doesn’t like, needs, etc. Once the honeymoon phase is over, we hear that you have to work at your relationship, especially if you want to keep that spark alive.
All of your partner’s likes and needs become commonplace. When you’re intimate with each other, you will eventually know what you’re doing and when to do it with the end result of pleasing your partner. However, when you just go through the motions to get to the destination rather than enjoy the journey, that’s when you’ll find yourself in a sex rut.
Why is it important to spice things up in the bedroom?
Well first, I don’t want people to think sex has to be limited to the bedroom. You can take it anywhere in your house (and that’s where a lot of the 369 dares come from), and even some places in public – just know the risk involved prior to getting frisky there.
Back to the question though, a healthy sex life is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. So if sex gets boring and mundane, you’ll likely start to have less of it and then that’s when the relationship could be nearing its end. Spicing things up, whether it is trying new places, positions, props, whatever, will add a new level of excitement and passion.
How can your book help?
My book can help in 369 different ways! But really, this book is an encouraging guide, offering suggestions on sexy dares worth trying with your partner. Each dare has a blurb explaining why it’s in the book, tips on how to do it and/or what makes it fun. Flip to any page and you will likely see something you’d want to try.
Having it in a book makes it so much easier to share with your partner. You can take two different colored highlighters and each pick what dares you want to try. Where the two colors overlap, you’ve got your starting point.
And I really just hope this book can open a dialogue for couples to discuss what they want and need sexually. You need communication in order to have a healthy sex life. If you’re looking to try something more adventurous sexually, you need to be able to talk about it. And really, there’s just no excuse for bad or boring sex anymore.
What do you suggest for those who are on the less wild side to get the spark back?
The book covers everything. Mild to wild. Nice to naughty. Sweet to ultra-steamy. There truly is something for everyone in The Naughty Bucket List. There’s a really great one about stroking your partner with a feather. You’d be surprised by how intense the stroke of a light, soft feather can be when it’s the only thing you’re focusing on in that moment. So that’s a great place to start.
Of course, some of these dares are certainly intimidating and some are more for laughs (because who can really check off “The White House” dare other than the President?!), but mainly I hope my book gets couples talking. For those who are a little more shy and working on communicating his/her needs, flip through the book and highlight the dares you’d want to try and then simply leave the book out on a counter or bed-side table for your partner to discover.
I don’t think you can look at the book and not have an urge to look through it. Start simple, and then as you feel more comfortable with yourself and with your partner, you’ll be more willing to try the more adventurous dares.
Enter to win 1 of 5 copies of the book! US & Canada. Open until March 31, 2012.