My confession? I didn’t think that motherhood would be this hard.

I have two kids, one is just four months old. I love my kids to death but I’m just really exhausted. I’m always tired and cranky because I am not getting enough sleep.

My husband works long hours and is so tired from work, he comes home and eats and then flops on the couch. I feel like I never have a break.

I’m always taking care of the kids, changing dirty diapers and getting thrown up on. I’m afraid to go out because I don’t think I can handle the baby and my toddler in public or the baby will be hungry and my toddler will be running off and I’ll have to chase him while I’m breastfeeding my baby.

Nobody told me that being a mom would be so hard. I mean, I knew that it would challenging but I know it is so rewarding too. I just feel like I’m totally on my own.

My parents don’t live here and neither do my in-laws (I wouldn’t want their help anyway).

I don’t know what to do to get out of this rut.

Author

Maria Lianos-Carbone is the author of “Oh Baby! A Mom’s Self-Care Survival Guide for the First Year”, and publisher of amotherworld.com, a leading lifestyle blog for women.

3 Comments

  1. I know how you feel. I have 4 (8, 6, 3 and 18mths) I don’t go many places anymore because of how difficult it can be to go places with my 3 younger ones, they are all boys and they are ALL. BOY! They hate shopping, fight at every opportunity, growl, shoot stuff, roar and just horse around. The 3 year old is your typical 3 year old who thinks it’s funny to run off on mommy and “hide” in a store, meanwhile I’m having a heart attack trying to find the little guy. It’s been very tough now that I have 4 because most of my friends only have 2 kids and they are in an easier stage of family life then I am. They tend not to invite me places because I have 4 kids because they can’t handle the business of my kids. And none of our family live close by either so I don’t have family support to fall back on when I am feeling overwhelmed by my kids.
    Some things I have done to help alleviate some of my frustration and stresses of being the main caregiver are to be more intentional with my friends outside of my kids. I have one friend that I do a weekly movie night with. I usually go to her house and we watch a movie and chat and have coffee, I have other friends that I do a monthly meal with (this one is harder to coordinate because we have 3 different schedules to work around), it also helps if you have friends who are good with commitment and not allowing other things to get in the way of your time together (this is hard to find, believe me). I also, do my grocery shopping alone in the evening and I enforce a quiet time on all my kids for at least an hour and a half each day, even my 8 year old. I need that time away from my kids each day so I can come back to them refreshed and ready to tackle the 3-5pm behaviour madness.
    Some other things to do, is to get involved in a playgroup of some kind and I’m sure you’ll find some other moms who are feeling just the way you are, and make it a commitment for yourself that you go no matter what, having a great support group of other moms is essential in these tough young years of your children’s lives.
    Motherhood is tough, and I wish they had put just how tough in the “manual”. ((hugs)) 😉

  2. Being a Mom to young children IS hard but it does get easier. We learn as we go and you will learn how to handle your kids in public, how to set boundaries and limits, how to breathe and relax! Motherhood is a difficult journey and the everyday can feel so trying, don’t give up, you’re not alone. One day your kids will be grown up and look back at what an amazing mom you are. Oh and I have three myself 🙂 4 months, 5 years and 8 years 🙂

  3. This is the first post I’ve ever read on this blog, and I have to say – it’s so dead on I could have written it myself. It is SO HARD to be a mom. I feel like I’m in the same place as you right now and just stuck in a rut with no idea how to get to a place where I’m not always exhausted, cranky and overwhelmed. I just started a garden recently, and although I don’t have as much time for it as I’d like… the act of getting outside and getting fresh air for a few minutes here and there is really, really nice. Eventually (when I’m no longer nursing), I want to have a night out with friends once a month too. After all – my husband gets to leave the house everyday for work…. He gets 9+ hours each day without the demands of babies and toddlers. I can hardly wait for my turn!

Write A Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.