This is a not-too-sexy but sorta kinda racy version of the Night Before Christmas.
I couldn’t resist having some fun!
Night Before Christmas Poem Sexy Version
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a child or husband was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings slung over the mantle without care,
In hopes that the gifts would magically be there;
All cozy and alone nestled all snug in my bed,
While visions of hot men danced in my head;
And me in my satin robe and hair up in a cap,
I had just settled down for a long winter’s nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I jumped from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open my robe and threw off the sash.
The moon on my breasts and the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to the surprise below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a bunch of hot men and their cute reindeer,
With a gorgeous driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be hunky Nick.
More rapid than race car drivers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
“Now, Alejandro! Now Roberto! Now Dimitri! Now Sven!
On, Brad! On George! On Ryan! On Glen!
To the top of Maria’s bedroom, at the top of the hall!
Now go with her! Go with her! Go with her all!”
As quick as a flash the men made up their way
Up to the top of my house in my bedroom to stay,
And then, in a twinkling, I heard in my room
All nine of them came to dance around me as I swooned
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Out came Roberto in Calvin Klein boxers with a bound.
Dimitri was dressed all in black from his head to his foot
And his clothes were torn with ashes and soot;
A bundle of gifts for me he had flung on his back,
And his muscles bulged as he opened his pack.
His eyes, how they gazed, his smile how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his lips like a cherry!
His droll little mouth pursed up like a kiss,
And the smell of his cologne was hard to miss.
His loosened tie he now held tight in his teeth,
And around his mid-section was nothing but a wreath
He had a stunning face and a six-pack belly,
That was so tight it could not look like jelly.
He was buff and tight, a hunky DILF
And I sighed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
None of them spoke a word, but went straight to their work,
They filled my room with gifts, then then turned with a jerk,
And laying the last gift on my bed, a rose
Alejandro kissed my cheek which was red I suppose.
They all sprang to the window and gave a big whistle
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard them exclaim, as they raced out of sight,
Merry Christmas darling Maria and to you a good night!